I live and train in Draper, Utah. The altitude is about 4,500 feet, probably 4,600 feet where I live. My parents live in Arcadia, CA, which is at 479 feet. I started doing triathlons in 2007, and this is the first time since 2008 that I have done any training in California. In other words, most of my triathlon career has been spent training in Utah, at altitude. And when I did any training here in California, it was very minimal, as in perhaps one four-mile run. I also weighed about 30 lbs more back then, and didn’t have a clue what I was doing and therefore didn’t pay much attention to how I felt when running–I just went out and ran.

I haven’t done any testing or anything sophisticated this time around, I just came down to spend Christmas with my folks and since I was going to be here for a few weeks I brought my bike and run gear. So, did I notice any difference training here in California, 4,000 feet lower than in Draper, Utah? I don’t like to swear, but heck yeah!

My first run down here was a 15 mile loop. It was pretty flat, with perhaps a total elevation gain of 100 feet at a very slight grade. That made it easier than running in Draper where I’m primarily doing hills. But even adjusting for the lack of hills, this was the easiest 15 mile run I’ve ever done in my life. My muscles got sore enough, but when it came to breathing, I never felt like I was breathing hard at all. I never felt like I had to rest at all, or walk any part of the way–it was just super, super easy. But I chalked it up as a fluke.

Then I went on a bike ride. Again, it was on a very flat ride down the San Gabriel river trail towards Seal Beach (a very nice ride, by the way), out and back. I wasn’t tracking my distance, that is I wasn’t looking at my distance during the ride, I just went to where I was running out of time and then turned around and rode home. I haven’t ridden for more than an hour in months. I rode for about three hours, 48 miles, and it was a piece of cake. It felt leisurely. I got a little saddle-sore, and my neck was sore from holding it up on a tri bike for that long, but breathing was easy, and my muscles didn’t get very tired (even though I neglected to bring any nutrition or liquids, not expecting to ride that far or long).

I’ve now done two more 7 mile runs, and those were super easy as well. I can only come to one conclusion–altitude really, really, REALLY makes a difference. I can’t point to anything else that has changed, and yet the effort I’m putting into these workouts is very noticeably less than what I usually put in while in Utah.

So what do I do about this? Well, perhaps I should think about doing more races in California, but keep the training in Utah.

1. Many of my clothes are too big, and my belt loops around almost to my back.

2. My wedding ring just falls off my finger, so much so that I don’t wear it any more because I’m afraid of losing it.

3. People I haven’t seen for a few years don’t recognize me (sometimes this is a benefit if I don’t really want to talk to that person).

4. I am no longer drought and famine resistant.

5. People think I’m mean when I tell fat jokes, whereas before it was ok because they figured I was just making fun of myself. I still am, they just don’t think I am.

6. People aren’t as hesitant to ask me to perform physical tasks, like moving heavy boxes.

7. Fat people I used to think were my friends now reject me.

8. I apparently don’t have as much padding on my backside, because it seems to get sore more quickly when I’m sitting down, especially on hard surfaces.

9. If I sleep on my side, I have to put something between my knees because they’re all bony now and hurt each other.

10. I just realized this one while writing this–I don’t get belly button lint buildup anymore, and I kind of enjoyed that. It was always blue for some reason.

Now, to fully appreciate how the events I’m going to describe to you could have happened, you have to appreciate how I get to my preferred locker spot in the locker room, which is the group of lockers nearest to the swimming pool. If one enters the normal way, one walks through the gym, enters the front of the locker room, walks the entire length of the locker room past all the lockers and sinks, and only then arrives at the last group of lockers. This group of lockers is more enclosed than any of the others, offering more privacy–not that privacy is my concern, proximity is, but I bring up the privacy aspect because it will be relevant shortly.

The alternative way to enter the locker room is to, instead of walking through the gym, enter the family locker room, walk through it, exit into the pool area, and then enter the men’s locker room. Upon entering, one walks past the hallway of showers (not through it, but past it), and then the last group of lockers is right there. I think it saves me a few steps getting there, plus it’s closer to the pool, as I mentioned, so I generally enter this way, although sometimes I go the other way just to throw anybody off who might be waiting to ambush me, like a terrorist or IRS agent.

Today, I entered in my normal way, that is, the alternative way, through the family locker room and pool area. As I turned to go into the locker room, I noticed a large sign place prominently near the front of the entrance, but I figured it was another promotion for some product or some event Lifetime was having, so I ignored it. Later I would realize I had indeed read it, but just didn’t process it.

I entered the locker room, passed the showers, and went into the last group of lockers. I chose one, undressed, put on my swimsuit, got everything else ready, and went into the showers to take a rinse off. In retrospect, I already felt that something was a bit strange, but my first real clue that something was wrong was when I noticed what appeared to be a woman’s swimsuit hanging over one of the glass shower doors. My second clue was the blurry figure through the glass that did not look very manly. Now what were those words I had seen on that sign outside? I think some of them were “temporary”, “women”, and “locker room”.

I dashed out of the shower stall and quickly exited into the pool area, probably looking a bit pale. A male gym employee happened to be standing there, and as I came through the door he looked at me a bit strangely. I looked at the sign again, which clearly read “Temporary Women’s Locker Room” and something about apologizing for the inconvenience. There was a separate sign in front of the women’s locker room explaining that it was temporarily the men’s locker room.

The gym employee assumed I had just walked into the women’s room after swimming, had quickly realized my error, and had done a rapid about face. I explained that no, I had indeed been in the women’s locker room for a good five minutes, had been naked for at least a few seconds of that time, had entered the shower area where there was at least one woman taking a shower, and only then had realized my mistake and come darting out. He seemed unfazed and not very amused, and expressed some disbelief that I hadn’t seen anyone else in the locker room sooner than I did. I explained that I was in the group of lockers that is more private, right next to the exit, so I couldn’t see anyone while I was changing, nor could they have seen me unless they had walked into that group of lockers. He said he would find a female employee to go inside and retrieve my belongings, which a few seconds prior had been merely a step or two away, but were now completely inaccessible to me.

Long story short, it all got sorted out and nobody will be pressing charges, but a few hours later I’m still a bit jittery.

Now, you might ask why the locker rooms were switched? Because of the renovations. You see, having completed the tile work in the men’s locker room, they had moved to do tile work in the women’s locker room, but I’m guessing the contractor they hired doesn’t have any female tile layers, and since the tile is being laid during business hours (which are 24/7) they had to move the women out temporarily.

1. Not listing the price of the event anywhere on the website. I’m not going to name names at the moment, but I’m trying to find out how much a certain triathlon here in Utah costs, and it is nowhere on the website, and the online registration system they are using doesn’t display the price either. Maybe it displays the price at the end, but only after you fill out a bunch of information. Just tell me how much the freakin’ event costs already! It’s not that hard, just look at how US Trisports does it. Easy, right?

Well, I only have that one pet peeve right now, maybe I’ll add more to the list later. I just had to gripe about this one while I was in the middle of it.

So here’s my list, from the inexpensive to outrageous:

Under $10

Blister Shield. Get them a few of these trial-size packets, and they’ll be thanking you the next time they run hard and don’t get any blisters. Tell them it’s better than Body Glide. Or play it safe and just get them some Body Glide.

Nuun Active Hydration. You know, I haven’t tried these yet, but EVERY SINGLE person I’ve talked to who has raves about the stuff.

Yankz Shoe Laces. A must-have for triathletes, unless they’re using Zoot shoes in which case this type of system is built-in. But if they’re running in Nikes, Saucony, etc. then they need a set of these for fast transitions.

Gu. The easy choice. Does anyone not like Gu? Get them a 6-pack of Gu for $7.

Under $20

Bento Box. One of the simplest, greatest inventions for carrying food on your bike.

Running visor. How about a running visor? Hey, everyone can use more triathlon clothing.

$20-30ish

This is where we start to have some fun.

The Triathlete’s Training Bible. This is THE book on triathlon. If the triathlete you love doesn’t have it, he/she needs it, even if they don’t like books.

1st Endurance Drink Mix. Trust me, this is good stuff. This ain’t Gatorade. Fruit punch is delicious.

Ironman Championship DVDs. If triathlon is half mental, this is food for the triathlete’s mind.

The good thing about buying a gift for a triathlete is that there are so many things they need and want. Most of what they need wears out, so even if you get them something they already have, chances are they’re going to need another one soon. And if they don’t need it, chances are they want it but are spending their money in their “needs” and will be grateful for the luxury of being able to use your gift without feeling guilty about having put off some other priority.

And of course if you don’t want to make a decision, you can always choose the easy route and get a gift card.

Anyway, this post is something of a test to see if it works the way I’ve set it up.

I think this is going to turn out to be a good thing. I’m a bit overwhelmed not having someone to tell me exactly what to do each day, but this has spurred me to really start digging into the Triathlete’s Training Bible and I’ve been learning a lot that I wasn’t learning before because I didn’t have to. As much as I enjoyed having a coach, and as much as I think I would race better this year with him as opposed to without him, I think it’s in my long-term best interest to be on my own at this point.

When I first starting triathlon, I didn’t know anything. Having a coach would have been great, but completely unfeasible financially. I didn’t even read books like the TTB because they seemed so overwhelming. There were so many words I didn’t understand that I didn’t know where to begin. What’s a cockpit? What’s an interval? What’s a split, taper, base, period, fartlek, or brick? What do the terms fast twitch, slow twitch, and glycogen mean? Every time I read an article or part of a book on triathlon I was completely confused because I didn’t know what half the words meant within the context of triathlon.

Over time I picked up things, but it was slow going. My training regimen consisted of doing a little more each week than what I did the week before. It got me to a half-Ironman, but it took me 7 hours and 13 minutes to finish it. When I was able to get a coach, I was ecstatic. And it made a huge difference. Not only did I have someone who could answer all my questions, but he was telling me exactly what to do each day. I started losing weight and improving my times dramatically.

During the past 6-7 months, I’ve learned a lot from my coach–enough that now reading the TTB isn’t so overwhelming. It’s overwhelming to try and figure out a 7-week half-Ironman training plan on my own, based on what I’ve been doing for the past 6-7 months, but if I were starting a brand new year it would be fairly straightforward. In other words, having a coach for half a year has provided the bridge I needed to get from being completely clueless to the point where I can learn on my own. If I’m not an expert on triathlon right now, I’m at least heading in that direction under my own power. And since it’s now up to me and nobody else, I think I’ll start progressing much faster in my knowledge, and while that might not give me as fast of times in my events this year as I might achieve otherwise, 2-3 years down the road I think I’ll be much better off for it.

Between yesterday and today, I had an entirely different experience with Lifetime Fitness, where I currently work out. No, I wasn’t canceling, and given the phone call I got this morning I might never cancel, not to mention that I’m much more likely to refer people to them.

Yesterday, I wrote a small, tongue-in-cheek, post about how I kept getting Lifetime Fitness sales calls, even though I was already a member. I only got 5 such calls, rather than the 47 I alluded to in the post, but 5 calls in a week was enough for me to find it interesting. After all, I’m a business owner, I know something about business processes, and I couldn’t figure out how Lifetime Fitness had gotten their system/data into such a state that I was getting these repeat sales calls asking me to sign up for something I had already bought. I regarded it as a curious phenomena, the same way a scientist might observe the previously-unknown behavior of some species of animal.

This morning, I received the following voicemail message from Lynn Paul, the Senior Director of Member Relations at the corporation offices of Lifetime Fitness in Minnesota. By the way, her tone was very pleasant and she evidently found my post humorous, as it was intended to be:

Good morning Joshua, this is Lynn Paul calling from Lifetime Fitness, I am the Senior Director of Member Relations, and I am not calling to ask you to join the club, or if anyone in your household would want to join. I see you have a 1-year old and would imagine she probably doesn’t have a lot of friends hanging out who would be good prospects for us to ask to join. I am calling to apologize, we located your blog yesterday and you had a dozen people running around here at the corporate office saying “What the heck is going on?!” including me. I wanted to just call and apologize very much for calling you nearly 47 times and asking you the same silly questions. We have gotten to the root cause of why you were on so many various lists and what has happened. I assure you we have taken you off of all of those lists, and we will not bother you again. I see you’re a very active member, that you’re going into the club quite regularly, hope you’re having a good time and that we’re meeting your needs. If there is anything I can do for you, please let me know. Again, I’m the Senior Director of Member Relations at our corporate office in Minnesota, my name is Lynn Paul and I can be reached at [she leaves her phone number here]. I also am planning to send you a gift card, just for your funny email and for letting us know that there’s a real serious issue going on. I hope you’re doing well, the gift card that I send you will indeed buy you several smoothies and hopefully a dinner and lunch or two. Thanks for being a member and thanks for sharing with us. As I said, you have us acting and we will be a better company for it. Again, Lynn Paul, if you would like to talk feel free to call me [phone number again].

So what did Lynn, and Lifetime Fitness, do right?

1. They had an alert system. I have no idea how they found my blog. Maybe they have a Google Alert set up (as all companies should have for their name). This isn’t the first time I’ve posted a “complaint” on a blog of mine before, but it’s the first time I recall getting a response.

2. They responded quickly. I posted yesterday afternoon, and I got this voicemail this morning. That’s fast. In fact, I’ve previously contacted other companies whose services I use via email and phone and haven’t gotten any response at all (I’m looking at you, Zions Bank).

3. Win-win…win. Lynn could have asked me to take down the post. She could have negotiated to get me to take down the post. But instead, she took advantage of an opportunity to turn a negative into a positive. Getting me to remove the post would have ended with negative consequences, since I probably would not have removed the post, and then I would have blogged about them trying to get me to take down the post. But by seeing the humor in the situation, not taking offense, and then going the extra mile to make me happy (not only by getting my name off the call list, but sending me a gift card with apparently more than a token amount on it), Lynn has turned a major PR debacle (assuming anyone reads this blog) into a PR benefit because others reading this series of posts will see second-hand, as I’m seeing first-hand, that Lifetime Fitness cares about doing things right and they’re treating me like a human being, not just a problem to be resolved.

Lynn’s attitude benefits Lifetime Fitness because not only has the original call list been solved (which was probably affecting other people other than myself), but I’m likely to remain a member for some time, and I’m more likely than I was previously to send my friends to Lifetime Fitness. And all it cost was a two-minute phone call and a $1,000 gift card…err, well, maybe $50.

But as long as I’ve got the folks at Lifetime Fitness reading my blog, maybe I should ask if they can build a new gym closer to me down in Draper. C’mon guys, trust me, there’s a great spot right off the freeway, and tons of people would use it. And can you put a 50-meter pool in it? Awesome, thanks.

I told this to the first guy who called me, but he just asked if anyone else in my house wanted to sign up. I yelled out to ask anyone else who might be in my house, but nobody else responded. When I got the next call, I started wondering if perhaps they had mixed up the “Already Members–Do Not Bother or They May Quit” list with the “Not Members–Call and Sell” phone number list. The third call strengthened my opinion, and the fourth and fifth further confirmed it. The interesting thing is that until this most recent call, none of the callers offered to take me off the list or ensure that I wouldn’t be called again. But today’s caller was very apologetic and promised to make sure I didn’t get called again, although she did ask me, once again, if anyone else in my house wanted to sign up.

All that technology out there, and yet Lifetime can’t get their sales people the right list of phone numbers to call. Tragic.

Sure, I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that, as the site claims “the majority of current training methods for an ultra-endurance event like an Ironman are derived from the training schedules, calendars, and lifestyles of professional Ironman triathletes who compete in the sport of triathlon for a living.” But can anyone’s body be prepared for a full Ironman without doing workouts that come close to or exceed those distances in an Ironman? Can you do a 112-mile bike ride without having done one before? Can you run a marathon without having run a marathon before? And if you’re going to do those two things, is there any way to get there without training at least 20 hours per week?

Now, perhaps Ben isn’t saying you don’t bike or run that far in his training package–but he does claim that you’ll be able to do an Ironman with “50% of the average training time”. But maybe this is just spin. 50% of the average training time of who? The average participant, or the average professional participant? I would guess the average pro spends around 40 hours per week training, and the average participant spends around 20 hours per week. Ben seems to imply that his training takes something on the order of 10 hours per week, since he claims in bold type that “…it is pure myth that completing the Ironman triathlon takes 15, 18 or 20 hours of training every week.” So obviously his plan must only take 14 hours or less. If nothing else is hard to believe on the webpage, that claim is. But hey, I’m not an expert, so I’m going to ask my coach what he thinks and I’ll get back to you.

——–

My email to my coach:

To me this reeks of a total scam, but I’m no expert. What do you make of the claim that someone can do a full Ironman with 14 hours or less of training per week?

Response from coach:

No scam, this is very possible. Notice that he does not give a guarantee to the time you will finish it in, just the fact that you will finish.

If you went out next week I bet you could do a 70.3 right now based on your 6 hour training weeks. It would take you 9 hours, but you could do it.

Ben is a friend of mine as well, so I am slightly biased. He’s obviously promoting this to individuals who just want to finish, not finish top 25%.

Unless you are genetically gifted, most 14-hour weeks for a 30-something male will cap out at a 12-hour IM finish.

David

Diagnosis: Poorly designed and marketed website (since it got me thinking it was a total scam–of course I’ve done web design for a living for 10 years so I’m slightly biased that way), but apparently a perfectly legit product.